There are three kinds of people.
1. Those who are too keenly aware of their weaknesses. Wise enough to know that pain, fear, and failure are a part a life and who have been a victim caught up and tangled in the spidery web of such emotions. Those who know that even with the best of intentions, feelings can get hurt. Or those who are ignorant or hopeful do not take away the sting of pain or failure. So people like this hold themselves back as to avoid such feelings from entangling them again. #1’s are great at keeping things balanced and in moderation.
2. Then there are those who are just like number one, except their confidence and dare I say arrogance has them on top of the ladder looking down while everyone else is still climbing……these people are what I call prideful, ignorant, and just plain beyond confident and straight into arrogance. The “I’m aware of these things but they will never happen to me because I’ve already thoughtfully calculated my risks and evaluated my options” people. These are the type who never take advice because they’ve “already got it figured out”. By the way, when something bad does happen….these people would be the quickest to blame everyone but themselves. #2’s are great entrepreneurs and leaders.
3. These people are the sweetest. So sweet you almost want to forgive them for being so blatantly blind. These people are the hopefuls among the hopefuls. They haven’t really given a thought to risks or consequences….they just kind of take a faith leap everywhere they go. Don’t get me wrong though…these people try to educate themselves on their options and choices…but since they are unable to grasp the reality of a situation they are apt to assume the position of “their experience will be different”. And so when life does turn out harder then expected….some of these people fall into a great depression….some reach out to friends and are able to muddle through eyes wide open while grasping for any reasoning and justification to make the situation better.
Sometimes #3’s turn into #1’s….especially if they were a #3 as a child or teenager and had to endure some pretty tough adult situations…but in general there are still a few #3’s out there who despite their rose colored glasses….are great friends.
I know I am a #1, although not by choice. When I can recall my childhood days I feel like I was at one time a #3. Maybe a conservative #3 but a #3 nonetheless. I know that between 1 and 3 there is a balance to having a little bit of each instead of a 90/5/5. I feel like this entire blog is one endless post of me striving to become this way…baby steps though right?
On another note….I miss my mom. It feels weird to type the words my mom. I can’t even remember the last time I said those two words together out loud…well with the exception of “my mom past away when I was 12″. That doesn’t count. Putting “my mom” and “past away” don’t go together….or at least they shouldn’t. I think what I miss the most is the mom I could have had today had she gotten better physically and mentally…my thoughts of what could have been….will always haunt me. And the reality of what did happen will always struggle to keep my #1 personality holding me with an iron fist.
Last night my husband and I were talking about our future and how I would like to have the choice of not working when we have children…but then the reality of not working hit me. What if he passes away? What if he leaves me? What if he loses his job and I’d been a stay at home more for a plus number of years…all of these what ifs to me not having a job….I don’t know if I my #1 personality will give me the comfort and peace of mind to actually stay home…..I don’t believe in happily ever afters. I don’t believe in fairy tale endings. I believe that rainbows come and go but are always brought on by rain and thunderstorms. I believe you best be ready for the thunderstorm, to endure it and not get washed away…I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to enjoy the rainbow w/o predicting and preparing for the rain by myself. In case you haven’t figured out, by myself is key. By myself is what makes a #1. You can’t depend 100% on anyone but yourself….and to avoid any feeling of pain or loss or hopelessness…that is what a #1just does.



